The flinch when ice-cold seat belt meets shoulder blade is quickly dismissed as his mouth finds hers. He tastes of Mountain Dew and Twizzlers and Polo and so much more than flavor of the month.
Muffled comments seep through vents. A random shout of “get a room” temporarily halts their exploration. Discovery resumes with grins and laughter, buttons and zippers. Roommates and secrecy means the darkest spot in the library parking lot and the backseat of a 1984 Oldsmobile must do.
Beads of sweat move along windows and skin. Groans escape from used springs and lips. Overloaded backpacks now ride shotgun with discarded t-shirts and jeans.
Wanting finally, blessedly, collides with taking.
Velour and metal absorb the impact far better than their world ever will.
This week, I want you to take me there. Where is up to you: Someplace real? Imaginary? From your past? In your future? It can be fiction or creative non-fiction. But make your descriptions so rich that I can’t help but feel like I’m right there.
Close your eyes, paint the picture in your mind, and then use your words to paint it for me.
You have 200 words.
To read FAR better stories, check out Write on Edge, formerly The Red Dress Club.
{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
Welcome back, friend. I’ve missed your writing!
This is great. Takes me back to high school and that boy. (Wait…did I just say that??) Oh, I thought he was a MAN at the time but he was really just a boy. Isn’t it funny how life has a way of changing your perspective?
Oh, I love when you turn up in my reader with hot, concise and eloquent lust.
I mean I always love when you turn up. But mmmm….
This definitely changes the meaning of “doing the dew.”
Or, um, maybe this IS the definition.
Excuse me, I have to go take a cold shower
.
Damn, girl. This is fabulous.
The Mountain Dew and Polo. The sweat on the window.
And that incredible line about collision.
Just right. And I love that last line. I want to know why.
I love the line “Mountain Dew and Twizzlers and Polo”…that brought me way back.
You did a wonderful job with this. You’re brave for sharing something so intimate with us…so thank you!
Thanks Jen! But totally fiction, I swear. Except the Oldsmobile part. Hubs did have one of those in college
Love! (and hi – it’s so great to see you)
Why the secrecy? I am intriuged by that…
You’ve captured the urgency of a car make-out perfectly.
And she’s back with a BANG!! Woot!!
Great job. I can see the windows fogging up.
Wow. That was very evocative. Turns the heat up this morning.
WHY must these be only 200 words?! You always leave me wanting more.
Awesome! (Fanning self, but somehow not getting any cooler.)
SO glad you’re back!
Very hot. And why did every guy bathe in polo?
So glad to see you! Before I opened this I was thinking that I had really really wanted to write about my “first time” tis week and skip Kimmy and David…I’m so glad that you sort of wrote it for me. This was hot and so Romeo and Juliet …I loved it!
“…and so much more than the flavor of the month.” I don’t know if you meant the pop song reference, but I loved it anyway.
Also, thank you for having a title that didn’t give it away but made perfect sense. Seems like that can be a real challenge with this sort of writing and I found it really refreshing.
Eek! You’re here!
Also? Hawt.
XO
Hot stuff, girl!
I think *your* story is fabulous.
Damn, that was hot. Makes me want more. Of your writing, that is…
Wow!
This is awesome. The pace is perfect, impatience and lusty want.
Yeehaw!
I think I need a cigarette and cold shower! Well done! It took me back to…. oh, never mind
Left me breathless!
Transported me back in time … you really don’t want to know how far back … we’re talking decades here LOL !
woooh. i enjoyed this.
good stuff.
I believe the term is historical fiction. Or were the botanical gardens really that pretty at night? Hmmmmmm? Missed ya. Glad you are back.